‘I’m worried about my son’s student loan. How do I raise it with him?’
Sunday, 22 March 2026
Senior business reporter Rob Stock answers your money questions. Got a question for Sunday magazine? Email it to sundaymagazine@stuff.co.nz
QUESTION: I’m worried about my son’s student loan. He is overseas, and I believe he is ignoring it. How can I raise the subject with him?
ANSWER: Your parental concern is understandable.
The student loans scheme’s fatal flaw is that it shovels money out of the door to inexperienced young people. While this does not matter so much for people who stay here, as their repayments are deducted from their incomes by the Inland Revenue, people who go overseas have to manage the repayments themselves, and a huge number fail to do so. Penalty interest mounts, and ultimately, the fear for parents is that the debts will become so large that their youngsters will fear to come home to visit, being afraid of being stopped at the border when they try to leave again.
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Sure, some of the non-payment will be intentional. But I recall how feckless I was when I was young. I was decent enough, and hard-working, but not the most organised, or strategic.
There were 77,700 overseas borrowers in arrears at the end of June. Many of them will be decent, but ill-organised and unstrategic as well.
Now, opening a conversation about money can be touchy. Youngsters can value and resent parental interest in equal measure. You’re aiming for an adult to adult conversation, not an adult to not-quite-adult chat. And don’t gang up. A conversation with one parent is often better than both trying to have it at the same time. Also, choose the parent who is best at these kinds of conversations.
As an opening gambit, I might use something like having read an article on the subject as a pre-text. It’s a reasonable enough excuse, and would also signal to your son that if he is a bit behind, he might not be alone. A “no judgment, no blame” approach is often preferable. You might also acknowledge you were not always wonderful at money management yourself.
In preparation, I would suggest educating yourself on how student loans work, especially the myIR system, which is an online platform run by the Taxman through which your son can manage his student loan. At the last count around just under seven in 10 student loan debtors living overseas were signed up to it.
Then search up the “Repaying my student loan when I live overseas” page on the Inland Revenue website. That will be useful in understanding what payments need to be made by when, though this will depend on how much your son earns. Helpfully, the money does not need to be paid in a lump sum. Setting up regular weekly or monthly payments can make it easier to manage.
It may well be you are happily surprised by what you learn when talking to your son, but if all is not quite right, it is likely ignorance (including wilful) will be playing a part in many money stuff-ups, so being able to offer helpful advice may prove a trump card.
Now, I don’t know what financial position you are in, but there’s also a carrot approach. You might, if it is worth it to you, decide that you might like to make a contribution to clearing the debt. That’s a reasonable gambit for getting involved.
That’s a decision for you. It may, in the long term, be money well spent.